


For Better or Worse

by iustuscadens



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man (Video Game 2018)
Genre: American Sign Language, Deaf, Deaf Clint Barton, Deaf Culture, Deaf Peter Parker, Eventual Return, F/M, Getting Overwhelmed, Hurt/Comfort, Loss of Powers, Muteness, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Selective Muteness, Snippet, Testing the waters with this one, Traumatic Brain Injury, Whump, a lot guys, caretaker, coming to terms, emotional angst, imperfect relationships, like a lot, mutual resentment, possibly a long story, recovery fic, short fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-08
Updated: 2018-12-08
Packaged: 2019-09-14 00:54:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,375
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16903032
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/iustuscadens/pseuds/iustuscadens
Summary: **SPOILERS FOR SPIDER-MAN PS4 LIKE IN THIS SUMMARY SO BEWARE**~~~Mary Jane thought that maybe, after all they had been through...after Martin Li, after losing May, after Octavius and Osborn and Harry...After eight and a half years of this mess, maybe, just maybe, the universe would give them a break.She holds on to this hope.She holds on to it when Peter goes missing.She holds on to it when she gets him back.But of course...like always, the universe has different plans.





	For Better or Worse

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Code SM-One](https://archiveofourown.org/works/16448339) by [BrightBloo](https://archiveofourown.org/users/BrightBloo/pseuds/BrightBloo). 



> ***SPOILERS FOR SPIDER-MAN PS4  
> So I was (for shame) at work when this popped in to my head. Just a random scene, that my heart was like "STOP WORKING AND WRITE THIS". 
> 
> That being said, this idea very loosely stemmed from the idea of Peter getting captured by Osborn, which I half entertained the idea of as soon as I saw that room (spoilers) in Spider-Man PS4 (you know the one), and then it was cemented even more when I read the beautiful, ongoing fic "Code SM-One" by BrightBloo, therefore that fic is tagged as being inspiration because I really love that fic so far, can't wait to see where it goes, and think you should all go read it. 
> 
> Anyways, the context of this scene is that Peter is captured by Osborn. And Norman, being eager as he is to find the root of Pete's mutation, does something that backfires and causes Peter to inevitably lose his powers (more-than-likely-shit science). Peter then, even more unfortunately, has a run in with some members of the Sinister Six. As it turns out, Octavius was not as tight-lipped about Peter's identity as a lot of us probably assumed he would be. 
> 
> And the result is this...and possibly more. I haven't decided if I should fully commit to this idea as a full-fledged fic. I don't know if I could do it the justice it would deserve. It would mostly serve as a recovery fic, but I realize as I write this that there's a real potential to delve in to this as a possible origin for Miles taking up the mantle of Spider-Man as well...
> 
> But I've been battling bad writer's block, trying to work on my next fic for my "Staying Close to the Ground" series, and having a lot of trouble. I got off the medication I've been taking the past couple months and it's like WOW, I can feel emotions again! And...out of nowhere I wanted to write something so I felt I should at least share it.

The words fly right over her head, a cacophonous mix of inaccessible noise, a conversation only meant for the two scientists. She has known them, or at least known of them, long enough to understand that this is nothing personal. This is just the way they get sometimes. Lost in the deep caverns of whatever problem they are trying to solve. It must be hard, sometimes, to have only a few other people in the world who can understand you.

But it goes both ways…

Mary Jane glances to the right, painfully aware of the eerily-silent body next to her. In all the years Mary Jane has known him, she has never seen Peter act like this before. Body broken, and hearing destroyed, he loses steam quite quickly, still recovering from the physical trauma he’d gone through. But his slouched form and bowed head speak less of physical fatigue and instead convey a…grim acceptance. Gone is the frustration of not being able to understand what is going on around him. Instead, he doesn’t even look at Tony or Bruce, voluntarily foregoing information he can only hope to get through reading their lips.

He says nothing.

Tony is going through another list of possible assistive technology, each more elaborate and complicated than the last, at the same time that Bruce is pushing for another battery of tests. _As if it would make a difference_ , Mary Jane thinks bitterly. This has all been so much to take in. She is starting to feel quite overwhelmed herself, she can’t imagine how Peter feels, though she can get some sort of inclination by his body language.

Maybe it’s that strange, innate connection she always believed the two of them had, but it’s at that moment that Peter finally stirs back to life.

Maybe he felt her bristle beside him, or maybe he picked up on the re-ignition of Tony and Bruce’s argument. Mary Jane feels the slightest brush of his fingers against the top of her hand, prompting her to turn her head to fully face him. She can feel the involuntarily tremor in his wrist translate against her skin.

“...I just want to go home,” He whispers, his eyes refusing to meet hers.

It's strange and unlike him. Mary Jane picks up on the self-conscious, pleading undertone in his voice. Her heart breaks for him slightly. Many a time MJ has seen her friend at rope’s end, but there’s always been something left to grasp at. Even when Peter was utterly defeated, there was always the remains of the fire, able to be stoked. This is a Peter Parker who has nothing left, at least not at the moment. But that Parker pride has always kept him from admitting what he needs. Part of it is responsibility, and part of it is unwillingness to show weakness, but Mary Jane knows that there’s a third, more self-destructive part that is Peter’s eagerness to please.  Mary Jane can read between the lines. He needs a break, but the two authorities in the room are expecting him to continue, _“for his best interest"_. Peter’s stuck, and when he’s stuck, when he’s _truly_ stuck, there are very few people he turns to. Most of whom are now dead…

Mary Jane has always been one of the few, and has fought her own battles trying to construct a balance that helps Peter without destroying herself. And it has been rocky. They both have faults. They both expect too much and too little of each other; at the same time, they both tend to sacrifice their own needs for the sake of others, while, in classic contradictory fashion, fighting tooth and nail against anything that holds them back. In the best of circumstances, they are each other’s greatest strengths. Holding each other up when no one else can. In the worst of circumstances, it’s a highly toxic wall of overbearing demands and unfulfilled needs.

 _I’m in the middle of the most important part of my life,_ she thinks before she can help it. It’s a bitter statement, but true: She’s the new assistant editor of the Daily Bugle, a job that requires more hours than actually exist in a day. People work years to get anywhere near a position like that, and Mary Jane managed to land it with not even five years experience as a journalist under her belt. It’s an amazing opportunity. It also means she’s got to prove herself every minute of every day. It’s a cutthroat field and there are dozens of people in the building who think she doesn’t deserve it. She can’t afford to be distracted by anything right now.

Panic and bitterness flow through her system. _How_ is she going to do this? _Why_ is this happening? Why _now_?

Then the other part of her kicks in.

Then the _guilt_ kicks in.

But who else does Peter have? And what is he supposed to do… _get over it? Alone?_ What kind of person would she be to leave him like this?

Mary Jane feels anxiety crawling up and threatening to suffocate her, staring at his sunken face. The bruises across his cheek and temple, the aged stitches running along his hairline.

She loves him.

More than anything, more than any other person in her life, more than any story, more than any position. Maybe more than life itself. Some days she resents him, and she’s sure he’s felt the same towards her. Some days she hates him, in the way that you momentarily hate something you know you _will never truly be able to actually hate_. But she loves him, and unlike other times in their lives, where their need was fueled by want, by lack of fulfillment, even by fondness or love, this is a different kind of need. He needs her, the way you need someone when you have literally nothing left. When you have exhausted all options, when you’ve put in everything you can and still come up short. If they were married, a road that she in her anxious mental state probably should not go down, this would be the “for worse” part.  
But damn it if they haven’t proved to each other, again and again, that they’re in it. For better or for worse.

Mary Jane turns her hand over, so that Peter’s fingers are skating across her palms, then closes her grasp, squeezing gently. Peter’s gaze flickers towards her for a second, before he squeezes back.

“Guys.” She says, turning her head towards Tony and Bruce, who are still in the heat of their argument. “ _Guys,_ ” She finally exclaims, her tone blunt, her volume just shy of a yell.

Bruce halts in his speech, focusing finally on the young woman, which breaks the spell that had kept both of them oblivious to the young couple's presence.

“We’re done,” Mary Jane states.

“But-“

“We don’t need to be here if you’re just _going to talk to yourselves_ ,” She replies harshly, which has the intended effect. Tony and Bruce clamp their mouths shuts, a slight bit of shame smeared across their expressions. “You’ve run a million tests, we’ve circled around option after option for days, and all we’ve achieved is running ourselves down, so I’m going home,” She pulls Peter’s hand in to her lap, all the while fixing Tony and Bruce with her most intimidating, mama-bear stare she can muster. “ _We_ are going home. To digest this.”

Understanding seems to dawn on the two scientists, who finally take in Peter’s overall body posture and exhausted gaze.

“Of course,” Tony finally says, sighing as he lets the papers in his hand fall to the table. “We’ll keep you updated from home base.”

“We appreciate that,” Mary Jane replies, finally pushing herself from the counter. She tugs gently on the young man’s hand, prompting him to glance up and between the four of them. The former hero reads the situation fairly quickly, assessing that MJ has negotiated their ‘release’. She sees the relief in the way his shoulders relax, as he stands up. She knocks her elbow gently against his arm, and that in turn elicits smile. It’s small, and haggard, but damn will she take it.

“Let’s get out of here, Tiger.”


End file.
